An array of random acts of dating gone wrong and other seriously enchanting bits of painfully acquired wisdom.
Imagine a life where Lady Luck had some kinda vendetta! The top of the world is a beautiful place until you're spiraling back down at Mach 3. In the Fall of 2009, I enrolled in College for the 3rd time, started a website called 'Pimp-Out-University' and was headed to Real Estate school in the Spring...
Of course, there were women everywhere; all I had to do was pick 1..... In my case, I chose 7!
Throw in the Champagne Suite at Christie's, so much alcohol that I could have single handedly been a cause to re-impose The Prohibition Act of 1920 and a complete disregard for the rules and imagine the Martini that'd make...... Well, it was more of a Molotav Cocktail, really!
If I was any kinda role model at all then Tommy Lee was my mentor and this is my story!!!
1: There is no such thing as 'the perfect match'! No dating service, book or professional can honestly guarantee you that you will find that special someone that has NO flaws or possesses everything on your requirement list. They simply DO NOT exist!
2: Looks aren't everything! Ask most of us about our significant other and within the first 2 characteristics we'll declare 1 of the following... 'They're hot, Have a great ass, Nice body, Long legs, Tall, Sexy or just plain Sssmmokin'!
Looking good is a given and even though many don't include it on their dateable must-haves' list it's the watermark that appears when you hold it under a light!
3: Money is NOT important! Huh?! WTF am I in college for then?? I better hurry n quit so I can get a job ringin up coffe at Sheetz then I could afford to ask out that really hot lady realtor. She'd love to go out with me, I just know it....
4: Abusive prior relationships will not affect future ones! Yes, not only will they but while you're being carefully compared to Sir Punchalot for early warning signs of abuse she's likely so reserved with her feelings at this point that you don't have much of a chance anyway. Move on!!
5: Sex only defines part of a relationship! I'll just ask that you read my book on this 1. Sex is about as subtle a prerequisite for successful dating as eating a big bag of Gold'n Crisp kettle kook'd chips in a movie theatre. Oh and btw, it's currently running against the Terminator for Gov.