The single life at its breaking point

My trusty sword!

Almost drunk dialing til you remembered something, excusing that she’s a complete bitch cuz she’s Bi-polar, serenades that never quite happened and other girls interrupted. Stay tuned!

Never let em’ see ya sweat! As I deleted my contacts list and gave my highly prized but recently turned off, and for good reason, (she was about as possessive and jealous as Rihanna at a Chris Brown concert back in the day) cellphone to my ex simply because she didn’t like hers.  ~Lost ball-sac…CHECK!

Now as I flip through my contacts, ya kno, past mom and dad, the baby’s mom and some tattoo shop I have no intention of ever visiting again, I realize the most obviously pathetic thing………. There ain’t a single chik in there that either me or her should or even could possibly, accidentally and or drunkenly dream of hooking up with!! This moment of lapses in judgement was brought to you by Bud light and its case after case of drunken, disorderly conduct consumption and thereafter chucking unopened bottles of it at your own car cuz you know she’s bi and she won’t drop the lezbo neighbor’s leg long enough to give the getting more pissed by the sec and I repeat DRUNK bf a kiss!

Where the hell’s the phonebook?…….

20/20 Vision; If only I had my contacts!:

It may not have been much but my fuscia Grav2 was my lifeline. I thought I was practicing preventative measures when I had it turned off bc of I.S.E. #2’s overwhelming jealousy. Imagine that! A slut with insecurity issues. Nevermind that, I was determined to see this through bc I felt like I could fix anything and this chik needed some serious engine work done.

In some sick way I felt as if I was giving her the 1 thing that could protect her from ever having to worry about being hurt by me. Excellent idea, Captain! Give her your sole communicator device so that way if she leaves you in deep space 9 you’ll possibly never make it back to earth…………..

Here’s my card! Sooo the contacts list is growing again and that’s a good thing except for 1 very important aspect; I can’t remember who’s numbers these are. I do however recall the women… Being so drunk that you cannot find your business cards and you have to rely on a mediator to put contacts in your phone is some hilarious shit unless you’re actually gonna ever call any of these chiks. Word of advice; it may seem primitive but ALWAYS write things down on something other than a cocktail napkin cuz after your 3rd or 4th Vodka-Tonic and 12 or 13 Bud Lights when the barmaid removes the same said napkin askin some gal who’s name you can’t even remember for her number again is absolutely douchery at its finest……..

WOW!! I never knew sexting was such a contact sport!

I used to believe that sex n cell phones were 2 completely different animals. I’m finding out that the more gals you add to your contacts list, the more time will be spent looking at dirty pics of the same chiks n having pretty intense convos about the ‘S’ word instead of where we’re goin’ for din-din Friday.

Oh well. Where would the world be without technology??

Uh, Oh! I think my phone has a leak in it!-Some gents enjoy havin femmes in their contacts even if they haven’t spoken to them for months n have pretty much no intentions on ever talkin’ to them again. Not this guy! Once a damn’s busted n the water flows rapidly under the bridge, I’m off to the calm waves of the next side of the beach! I’ve guess-timated that I prolly deleted about 15 chiks off my celly in the past couple of months n I couldn’t be happier. I mean, no worries about accidentally drunk-dialing, no text-wars, no go-backs! There’s a reason that some names are no longer available in the digital Rolodex n if that’s the case, I musta said “have a nice life” already!

The ‘Hello’ Pages:

Sooo while the contacts list seems to be endlessly growing, #’s are gettin’ deleted faster than you can ask, “WTF”?! I’m sure I’ve mentioned somewhere in the past that I am not the sorta dude to keep hangin’ on when there’s obviously nothin’ left to hang on to; so with that said, I’m still cuttin’ off my nose to spite my face! Some of these gals I keep around on here just in case but when they drunk-dial me, I generally tell them to fuck off so that doesn’t really make much sense either. I think the only chik that’s lasted longer in my contacts than 3 or 4 weeks is my daughter’s mother n we fuckin’ hate each other!

Look! I don’t set out like some sorta vindictive mad man when it comes to chasin’ the ladies, I just know when there’s nothin’ else much gonna come out of a situation n I shut it down b4 it’s too late to save myself from the wrath of Mother Nature. Sad thing is that I’m becoming used to my life bein’ a revolving door of wasted chances n broken hearts but what’re ya gonna do???…

Any single gals out there wanna hit me up? 330 415-0*3*. ttyl…


 You can call me whatever ya want but please jus lose my #!

Used to take a long time to wear on my nerves n get me to the point of actually unfriendin’ your ass,…IN REAL LIFE but lately I’ve seen the error of my ways n holdin’ onto your exes is jus NEVER a good idea. Firstly bc if I ended up hatin’ you the 1st time, why would the 2nd time be anymore fun? Speakin’ of ‘witch’, (still miss ya, Mindy) I had the pleasure of missin’ a call from I.E. #8 a couple of weeks back n each n every part of me wanted to answer my phone, except the part that I use to create thoughts n problem solve of course n thank the good Lord I was sober bc I jus may be writin’ this about how she sold my soul to the devil when I wasn’t lookin’…

As difficult as it was, I finally found the resolve to delete her from my contacts… If only it was that simple to delete her from my heart…… Oh well! Least I can find solace in knowin’ that it ain’t me that she’s makin’ miserable anymore! Good luck, new dumbass! I gotta keep it movin’ n my advice to you,… “Don’t unpack your shit! You ain’t goina be around long enough to get comfy”!!!… Trust me! Been there, fled from that!





45 responses

  1. how this site is set up, fresh, good ideas for your content many people

    April 17, 2011 at 4:04 am

  2. Superb blog! Do you have any recommendations for aspiring writers? I’m planning to start my own website soon but I’m a little lost on everything. Would you propose starting with a free platform like WordPress or go for a paid option? There are so many choices out there that I’m totally overwhelmed .. Any ideas? Bless you!

    April 17, 2011 at 8:22 am

    • It is always a good idea to practice. Once you’ve really gotten the hang of it, it’ll be more beneficial to start a paid site. You would also be testing the marketability of your ideas on a blog before you take it further.

      April 19, 2011 at 6:28 pm

  3. Heya i am for the first time here. I found this board and I find It really useful & it helped me out much. I hope to give something back and aid others like you helped me.

    April 17, 2011 at 9:24 am

  4. I got what you mean , saved to my bookmarks , very nice website .

    April 17, 2011 at 11:44 am

  5. My neighbor and I had been just debating this particular subject, he’s normally searching for to prove me incorrect. Your view on that is nice and precisely how I actually feel. I simply now mailed him this site to indicate him your individual view. After looking over your web site I e book marked and can be coming again to learn your new posts!

    April 17, 2011 at 12:52 pm

  6. You may have not intended to do so, but I think you have managed to express the state of mind that a lot of people are in. The sense of wanting to help, but not knowing how or where, is something a lot of us are going through.

    April 17, 2011 at 3:54 pm

  7. I’ve just lately began a weblog, the data you present on this web site has helped me tremendously. Thank you for your whole time & work.

    April 17, 2011 at 6:19 pm

  8. it’s okeh I like to use some of the information people provided upon my personal web website. Basically track once more to your web page wouldn’t it be OK to do this… Anyway our thoughts go with those close by Tokyo hopefully your are ok as well as secure !…

    April 18, 2011 at 5:04 am

  9. Great stuff from you, man. Ive read your stuff before and youre just too awesome. I love what youve got here, love what youre saying and the way you say it. You make it entertaining and you still manage to keep it smart. I cant wait to read more from you. This is really a great blog.

    April 18, 2011 at 2:22 pm

    • I’m glad you took the time to check it out. Thanx for the read. Stop back again!

      April 18, 2011 at 10:15 pm

  10. Wonderful beat ! I would like to apprentice while you amend your website, how can i subscribe for a blog site’ The account helped me a acceptable deal. I had been tiny bit acquainted of this your broadcast offered bright clear concept

    April 18, 2011 at 9:23 pm

  11. Hi there, You’ve done a fantastic job. I will certainly digg it and personally recommend to my friends. I am sure they will be benefited from this website.

    April 19, 2011 at 3:58 am

  12. Hi buddy, your blog’s type is simple and clean and i like it. Your blog content articles are superb. Please retain them coming. Greets!!!

    April 19, 2011 at 4:36 am

  13. We’re a group of volunteers and starting a new scheme in our community. Your website provided us with valuable info to work on. You have done a formidable job and our entire community will be thankful to you.

    April 19, 2011 at 9:51 am

  14. all of what you say happens to be astonishingly legitimate and it makes me wonder the reason why I hadn’t looked at this in this light previously. This particular piece truly did switch the light on for me as far as this specific subject goes. Nevertheless at this time there is actually just one point I am not really too comfy with and while I attempt to reconcile that with the main idea of your point, allow me see what the rest of the readers have to say.Nicely outlet

    April 19, 2011 at 6:08 pm

  15. Hello there, You have done an excellent job. I will definitely digg it and personally suggest to my friends. I am sure they’ll be benefited from this site.

    April 20, 2011 at 1:33 am

  16. Hi! I know this is kinda off topic nevertheless I’d figured I’d ask. Would you be interested in exchanging links or maybe guest writing a blog article or vice-versa? My blog covers a lot of the same subjects as yours and I feel we could greatly benefit from each other. If you happen to be interested feel free to send me an e-mail. I look forward to hearing from you! Terrific blog by the way!

    April 20, 2011 at 4:15 am

  17. You got a really useful blog I have been here reading for about an hour. I am a newbie and your success is very much an inspiration for me.

    April 20, 2011 at 9:48 am

  18. Your blog is outrageous! I mean, Ive never been so entertained by anything in my life! Your vids are perfect for this. I mean, how did you manage to find something that matches your style of writing so well? Im really happy I started reading this today. Youve got a follower in me for sure!

    April 21, 2011 at 3:22 am

  19. Your writing style is so sophisticated that my eyes are almost bleeding, lol…J/K 🙂

    April 25, 2011 at 10:00 pm

  20. I dont actually have a lot interest in your blog but I observed it at yet another blog sharing great wp themes and in addition they used yours as a example and it can be very nice, good job!

    May 18, 2011 at 8:38 pm

  21. F*ckin’ tremendous issues here. I am very happy to see your article. Thank you a lot and i am looking ahead to touch you. Will you please drop me a e-mail?

    May 19, 2011 at 11:33 am

  22. Thanks, I liked this blog post. I found this site using Yahoo search, and certainly enjoyed taking time to read it, so I’ll probably stumble through again within a month and read up on what’s new 😀 Good stuff!

    May 19, 2011 at 4:49 pm

  23. You made some respectable points there. I seemed on the internet for the problem and located most people will go together with along with your website.

    May 19, 2011 at 6:34 pm

  24. I’d have to check with you here. Which is not something I usually do! I enjoy reading a post that will make people think. Also, thanks for allowing me to comment!

    May 19, 2011 at 7:50 pm

  25. This is really interesting, You are a very skilled blogger. I’ve joined your feed and look forward to seeking more of your fantastic post. Also, I’ve shared your website in my social networks!

    May 23, 2011 at 9:52 am

  26. I like the helpful info you provide in your articles. I will bookmark your blog and check again here regularly. I’m quite certain I will learn plenty of new stuff right here! Best of luck for the next!

    May 27, 2011 at 6:49 am

  27. I’ve lately started a blog, the information you provide on this website has helped me tremendously. Thank you for all your time & work.

    May 28, 2011 at 6:55 pm

  28. I really like your writing style, good info , thankyou for posting : D.

    May 29, 2011 at 4:57 pm

  29. High-quality concept, I anticipate high-quality information of your stuff.

    May 31, 2011 at 8:49 am

  30. I do trust all the ideas you’ve introduced for your post. They’re really convincing and can definitely work. Nonetheless, the posts are very quick for newbies. Could you please lengthen them a little from subsequent time? Thank you for the post.

    May 31, 2011 at 2:26 pm

  31. Definitely, what a fantastic website and instructive posts, I definitely will bookmark your website.Best Regards!

    June 3, 2011 at 6:47 am

  32. Could I mention what a guide to discover somebody who is really aware of what they are talking about on the net. You actually know easy methods to provide a matter to mild and make it useful. More individuals must see this and understand this facet of the story. I can’t believe you are no more popular since you definitely have the gift.

    June 3, 2011 at 12:44 pm

  33. You certainly get some flexible beliefs and ideas. Your website gives a brand new look at the subject.

    June 3, 2011 at 9:37 pm

  34. Thanks for your own efforts on this web site. My mom enjoys getting into investigation and it is easy to understand why. My partner and i learn all relating to the dynamic ways you offer good secrets on the blog and therefore improve contribution from some other people about this subject plus our favorite daughter has been learning so much. Enjoy the rest of the new year. You are always performing a brilliant job.

    June 10, 2011 at 6:53 am

  35. I like this internet site because so much useful stuff on here : D.

    June 10, 2011 at 10:56 am

  36. I like your writing style truly enjoying this web site .

    June 12, 2011 at 5:53 pm

  37. Great blog here! Also your website loads up very fast! What host are you using? Can I get your affiliate link to your host? I wish my site loaded up as fast as yours lol

    June 14, 2011 at 6:02 pm

  38. I like the helpful information you supply to your articles. I will bookmark your weblog and check once more here regularly. I’m slightly sure I will learn lots of new stuff right here! Good luck for the next!

    June 14, 2011 at 6:14 pm

  39. I saw the heading of your blog post – My trusty sword! A Matter of Circumstance – while I was Googling on the internet a few minutes ago. Can if I put a link back to on my website?

    June 16, 2011 at 4:49 am

  40. Hi there, You’ve done a great job. I will certainly digg it and personally suggest to my friends. I am sure they will be benefited from this web site.

    June 17, 2011 at 6:37 am

  41. yeah bookmaking this wasn’t a bad conclusion outstanding post! .

    July 7, 2011 at 10:31 pm

  42. Stumbled on your webpage whilst I was browsing for information and facts for our web-site, obviously this isn’t all releative but its amusing how you can access a website by mistake and find your self perusing something very different but just as worthwhile. I tend to get distracted a hell of a lot like that.

    July 8, 2011 at 5:22 am

  43. I think you have produced several rather fascinating points. Not too many people would actually think about it the way

    September 30, 2011 at 3:15 pm

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s